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The Key To The City Was Nice, But...

While I recognize that one player capturing a handful of individual awards doesn't quite deserve the same level of celebration as an enormous international soccer win, I'm still disappointed that my fellow D.C.-area residents didn't honor Alex Ovechkin's hardware haul the way Muscovites celebrated Russia's Euro 2008 quarterfinal win this past weekend:
Moscow is naked, drunk, all covered in broken glass.... [Tverskaya St.] is cordoned off, girls are lying on car hoods and roofs, people are attacking empty garbage and dump trucks, getting inside, beating on them, screaming; all guys are naked, some of them have beautiful bodies; girls at the sidewalks take their t-shirts off and walk around topless; everyone is impossibly happy, carrying each other on the shoulders, kissing, running to hug with strangers and drivers of the cars passing by; nothing like this has ever happened before, traffic rules are gone to hell, a road hysteria has begun.
Oh well. At least we now know what will be expected of us when Alex and his comrades bring the Cup to D.C.

H/t Deadspin