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They Grow Up So Fast...

When my wife told me the utterly unsurprising news that the multi-untalented Lindsay Lohan had been arrested for drunk driving for the second time in the past two months (a time span during which she had spent six weeks in rehab), I couldn't help but shake my head and think back to a more pure and virtuous time for LiLo, a time spent gyrating as the opening act to a throng of transvestites dancing around a ball-gagged Brendan Shanahan (surprisingly, the link is SFW).

Now, sadly, that innocence is lost, never to return.