FanPost

Wacky Trade Ideas

Just to see what I could come up with, I tried to think of extremely unlikely yet marginally plausible trade scenarios pre-deadline. Feel free to add your own in the comments.

Note: George McPhee, please don't take these ideas too seriously.

1) Washington sends Tomas Fleischmann, Mike Green, and Shaone Morrisonn to the New York Rangers for Ryan Callahan, Wade Redden, Marc Staal, and Brandon Dubinsky.

I figure that Redden may flourish like he did in Ottawa with a high-powered, as opposed to anemic, offense. If he doesn't work out Staal is a great young defensive defenseman. Plus, I wanted to make a trade for Callahan and Dubinsky.

2) Washington sends Alex Ovechkin, Jose Theodore, Mathieu Perrault, and Shaone Morrisonn to Detroit for Henrik Zetterberg, Nicklas Lidstrom, and Chris Osgood.

What? Trade Ovechkin? Well, Zetterberg is an elite pivot, and Lidstrom and Osgood would be great for competing for the Cup this season. Detroit gets back a replacement skill center, a young defenseman, and that guy who's been playing well for the Caps since he got "called up" from Russia. Balancing money in this one was tough.

3) Washington sends Alex Ovechkin, Semyon Varlamov, and Chris Bourque to the Pittsburgh Penguins for Evgeni Malkin, Marc-Andre Fleury, and Mike Rupp.

Pens nation can quit clamoring for a winger for Crosby, Bourque continues his fun round trip, and Mike Rupp was a Cup-winning Devil, and still has a cool name. We gladly take on "the worst puck handler in the history of hockey" (as I sometimes see him called) in exchange for "the Iron Curtain."

4) Washington sends Michael Nylander to Omsk for Jaromir Jagr

I don't know if this is legal, but I thought it would be pretty cool, just as long as Jagr's salary is renegotiated down. A lot.

5) Washington sends Alexander Semin, Brian Pothier, Karl Alzner, and Jose Theodore to Toronto for J.S. Giguere, Dion Phaneuf, and Luke Schenn.

I figure Semin and Pothier are Burke-type players, Theodore is the "bad contract" Burke said he'd be willing to take on with the prospect as Alzner. In return, the Caps' blueline gets better and the goaltending situation becomes dependable and clutch all the time. Mostly.

6) Washington sends Alex Ovechkin to the Pittsburgh Penguins for Sidney Crosby and Mike Rupp.

Oh, the irony. And Ovechkin and Mike Rupp are getting their names tossed around quite a bit. I think Eklund will have a rumor up within 24 hours...

7) Washington sends everyone on its roster save Nicklas Backstrom and Mike Knuble to the Los Angeles Kings for everyone on its roster save Ryan Smyth.

I figure having a Slovenian in Anze Kopitar on the Caps would get a friend of mine into hockey, and I've never come across a rule forbidding such a trade.

8) Washington sends Craig Laughlin to the Chicago Blackhawks for Eddie Olczyk, then sends Joe Beninati to the New Jersey Devils for Mike Emrick.

For the good of hockey fans all around. NBC, Chicago, and New Jersey tack on great announcers, and for what it's worth, "Doc and Edzo" aren't half bad, especially when they call their local network games. I'm not quite sure what the salary cap implications are, though.

9) Washington sends Matt Bradley and Karl Alzner to San Jose, San Jose sends Dany Heatley and a 2nd-round pick to Minnesota, Minnesota sends Cal Clutterbuck and Mikko Koivu to Washington. Minnesota also sends Martin Havlat to San Jose, and Washington sends Alexander Semin to Minnesota.

Brads' blood all over the ice should keep the Sharks in the Shark Tank, while the Caps get the guy with the coolest name ever and a great two-way forward. Minnesota also gets some help on offense and San Jose gets a guy who was clutch for the Hawks in the 2009 postseason.

10) Washington sends On Frozen Blog to Toronto for Down Goes Brown and Pension Plan Puppets.

OFB does a great job getting to where others can't. The Caps blogs I think could use some more humor like at DGB and PPP. No offense, Japers' Rink.

11) Washington sends Mike Green, Karl Alzner, Brian Pothier, and Semyon Varlamov to Nashville for Dan Hamhuis, Shea Weber, and Ryan Suter.

Nashville gets their next goalie and finally a couple of guys to step in where Timonen and Zidlicky left as puck-moving passing defensemen (better than Weber is right now, I think) while Washington gets a solid group of defensemen with which to build a dynasty. Something also tells me Mike Green would love that city of music. Win-win-win-win-win-win-win-win-win here. (Added 1:30pm, 2-20-2010)

That's all for now. If you come up with a really nice one in the near future I'll put it up and credit you.  (Duh, it'll go green. Edit: 1:30 pm, 2-20-2010).

If this FanPost is written by someone other than one of the blog's editors, the opinions expressed in it do not necessarily reflect those of this blog or SB Nation.

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